Perhaps It’s Time

I confess.  There are aspects of my work that I rarely discuss. I engage in these as part of my “ministry,” which encompasses my commitment to serving humanity.

Transition of life

Very recently, I had the opportunity to spend the last few weeks with an elder of mine. She was a woman in my community who I had become very close to after the loss of my mother. I called her Aunt and joked she was my adoptive mom, but really, we became best friends. 

The past few weeks, which would be her last few weeks, we talked about aging and the transitions that getting older brings.  Her husband had fallen and suffered a severe head injury, which changed the trajectory of her easy-going, well-protected life.  She never complained, yet I noticed stress in her and a decline in her health.

Our conversations often turned to how people moved through this last part of life. Some had a strong mind, yet their body failed them, while some had a strong body, yet their mind failed them. Why was that?

She wasn’t afraid of these conversations and even began to give me her thoughts on what to do if something happened to her.  I listened and took the information in for her family.

These conversations with her were filled with compassion and love, not fear. Death and dying are challenging subjects. Not many people like to talk about them. Yet, experience has taught me that when we work with the depth of our soul, we can understand that life is everlasting. Consciousness lives beyond the body. 

Physical & Spiritual Deaths

We all face the inevitability of physical death, but along our journey, we may encounter several spiritual deaths as well. These experiences are integral to the process of our eventual physical demise. How we navigate these transitions plays a significant role in our overall well-being. It’s essential to reflect on how we support ourselves during these times and how we perceive our health. By understanding these aspects, we can make more informed choices about approaching the end of life. Embracing this journey can lead to deeper insights and a more meaningful relationship with our mortality.

Palliative Care

Shortly after my ordination as an Interfaith Minister in NY, I noticed that I was often called to help people who were ill and starting the transition phase of their lives. My training included working with Reiki Energy, which helps to ease the struggles and pain. At first, most people thought they were calling me to offer Reiki to their loved ones, but it became clear to me that the souls of these loved ones were calling me in to help ease their transition.

Palliative Care is a specialized form of care that provides relief from the symptoms and stress of serious illnesses. Its primary goal is to improve the quality of life for patients and their families as they enter the final stages of transition.  Through my training, I am called to spiritually help through the final stages of life. When words become too much, I offer Reiki to ease the soul and help release the struggles beyond the capabilities of pain medicine.

My work has expanded over the years, and since returning to the community I was born into, I have been asked to participate in the Sacred Jewish burial rites known as the Chevra Kadisha, which includes a beautiful ceremony of preparing the body for burial.  Long ago, this work was considered secret and sacred.  It was kept quiet and wasn’t talked about. It is considered an honor and an act of kindness that can never be repaid. 

I’ve kept quiet about my work for many years, but this past week, while preparing for my dear friend’s departure, I realized that by not discussing it, we allow these challenging aspects of life to remain unspoken, leaving many in isolation.  It’s crucial to open up conversations around these topics.

Through my friend’s passing, I learned that I could make a greater impact by sharing my experiences to serve families and support those transitioning from midlife into their elder years, helping us all understand that we create our own paths within our souls, even the path of death.

My work with Reiki and Spirituality, rooted in my background and upbringing, guides me to speak more openly about these life stages. We face various choices—some within our control and others beyond it—and we can approach these transitions with a spiritual mindset. Utilizing energy protocols can bypass the intellect and engage in rituals and practices that help alleviate the struggles of our physical conditions.

Summoning Courage

When we summon the courage to embrace and openly discuss the challenges we face, particularly in the context of life’s transitions, we create a transformative space for ourselves and those around us. This act of courage allows us to approach these subjects from a place of clarity and mental well-being.

Fostering open conversations cultivates an environment where vulnerability is welcomed rather than shunned. This healthy state of mind empowers us to address our fears and anxieties without judgment, leading to a deeper understanding of ourselves and our experiences. Embracing these discussions with grace allows us to easily navigate difficult emotions, transforming potential sources of stress into opportunities for connection and healing.

Moreover, when we approach these topics with love—for ourselves and our families—we establish a foundation of support that enriches our relationships. We learn to communicate our needs and feelings more effectively, which fosters empathy and compassion within our family dynamics. This openness can also serve as a model for future generations, teaching them the importance of discussing life’s complexities with honesty and care with their elders.

Embracing and talking about our experiences doesn’t just benefit us individually; it creates ripples of understanding and love that extend to our families and communities. It creates a oneness.  We can face life’s challenges together, celebrating the beauty of connection and the strength of shared experiences. Ultimately, this journey becomes a testament to our resilience, reminding us that with courage, grace, and love, we can navigate even the most difficult aspects of life with dignity and peace.

This conversation continues on The Empowered Spirit Show with my guest, S. Kelley Harrell, and her book, From Elder to Ancestor: Nature Kinship for All Seasons of Life. We explore the spiritual, cultural, and ancestral aspects of aging well and dying well.